Auschwitz, the whole purpose of our trip to Poland. My fellow companion, who I’ve nicknamed Ahab due to her mad navigational skills, kindly arranged a private driver to take us there. Peter, our driver, naturally only spoke to us when spoken to (see rule 2 from the previous post). He picked us up from our medival themed hotel in Old Town on a rainy day for the hour long drive to Auschwitz. I thought the rain fit the occasion.

The museum at Auschwitz is free and it’s easy to explore on your own, but we hired a guide for 33 PLN (about $11). It’s a group tour where everyone gets a headset and the guide has a microphone and we’re able to hear the guide through the headphones. It’s a great way to give a tour, especially in a place as somber as Auschwitz. Our guide was fantastic. We first watched a very moving documentary on Auschwitz and Auschwitz Birkenau. I had to struggle not to cry during the movie as it was a wonderful demonstration of how brutal the Nazis were. Auschwitz is much smaller than Birkenau. Birkenau is roughly 438 acres whereas Auschwitz is much smaller. In fact, Birkenau was built because Auschwitz was too small to acheive the evil goals of the Nazis. Birkenau was the largest of all the Nazi extermination camps.

If I had only two words to sum up the camps it would be savage and inhumane. Although the Nazis destroyed the massive gas chambers and creamatoriums at Birkenau, the remains are still there to see how large they were. We also walked into a gas chamber and creamatorium in Auschwitz. It was unbelievable and overwhelming to think that we were standing on the exact spot where thousands and thousands met their death unexpectedly. I found that part the most difficult to tolerate as well as looking at pictures of children who had been the victim of experiments. I thought Birkenau was more moving than Auschwitz. It’s weird to say that because Auschwitz had several photographs and items from former prisoners there, but it had a museum like quality to it where everything was roped off and partitioned by glass cases, but at Birkenau visitors are able to roam the grounds freely and explore on their own. You walk along the train tracks that we’ve seen so many times in documentaries which were used to transport people to the camp.

It’s hard to talk about what the visit their meant to me. In fact, it was even difficult for Ahab and I to talk about it afterwards. We were silent for a good part of the car ride back to Krakow, each lost in our own thoughts about what we had witnessed. I was left with the feeling that it only takes a generation, a generation of brainwashing to change an entire culture. That’s a scary thought!

Krakow, Poland.

I’m convinced the Russians were friendlier right after the fall when I was there than the native Krakowians. Although beautiful architecturally, if Mr. Rogers wanted to be my neighbor, I’d have to tell the old man, nie! In my two days here, I’ve discerned two rules:

1) Golden Rule-speak only if spoken to. People avoid eye contact, smiling and even speaking. We noticed this when we were at the Cloth Hall, a beautiful building built for the cloth trade back in medival times, but now houses tacky tourist souvenirs. Vendors refused to acknowledge our presence. Is it better for a vendor to follow you around and stare at you as if you’re casing the joint or to act like you’re not there? At this point, I’m no longer sure.

2) “I don’t know” roughly translates into “I don’t want to deal with you.”

Aside from the cold fish, cold war mentality, we’ve had a great time. The city, Old Town in particular, is stunning. In our first 24 hours we accidentally got caught up in a pro-atheist rally. I tried to take a picture of a guy with a Yankees umbrella to show that they really are allied with the Enemy and part of the Evil Empire, but some godless heathen blocked my shot.

We saw the Wawel Castle where we tried to hunt for the Wawel dragon (these people are obsessed with the ancient lore of the dragon who allegedly lived in the castle). Shocker the dragon remained elusive. After our failed dragon hunting, we tried to find a pub to have a polish beer and some perogies, but they’ve strategically hidden their pubs down long alleyways and in basements. We settled on a cute pub in the cellar of a medival building and had some Tyskie beers and perogies for lunch. The beer was pretty tasty, but the bartender was not. It took me butchering “thank you” in Polish to get a smile out of him. After refueling we debated on taking a tour of the city in a golf cart (no joke), but we decided to walk off the beer. For dinner we went to Pod Aniotami (“Under the Angels”), according to Lonely Planet the restaurant, “occupies valuted cellars decorated with traditional folksy knicknacks and offers excellent typical Polish food in an attractive atmosphere.” It was a delicious and the restaurant looked very Sud de France and if it wasn’t for the wait staff we would’ve really loved this place, but with house wine at $3 a glass and two giant glass enclosed wood grilled ovens what’s not to love?

We later partook in the local liquor i.e., lots of flavored Wodka. I tried a 70 proof honey vodka. I’m pretty sure I actually drank honey flavored gasoline. Someone could’ve lit my dragon breathing breath on fire.

We tried to cap off the evening at the Irish Embassy, which is billed as one of the best bars in Krakow and the largest Irish Pub in Poland. We’re convinced it was the largest Irish gay bar as we were the only two women in the multi-level establishment. It was either because some important football game was on or because we found the only gay Irish theme bar in all of Poland. Knowing us, I’m banking on the latter. Either way there are a lot of good looking, tall men here, prompting us to wonder, who let the cougars off their leashes? We are cougars, hear us roar.